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Greetings fellow Poets ✍️
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Today I turn 29 years old and I feel blessed! My day started like all the other ones, pretty standard. I went to work for a bit, had lunch with my partner, did some more work and finally, we went to dinner with my sister-in-law and her partner. Overall was a chilled day.
Since yesterday I've been reflecting a lot about where I was a year ago and thought that this was an excellent opportunity to share a poem - or two in this case. Today's share is mostly to show you the difference a year had in my life and how it reflected on my mind and my thoughts.
A year ago I was going through the worst phase of my depression, adjusting to my anti-depressive medication. A year ago, my mind was so wrapped and so null that was filled with suicidal thoughts. Not that I wanted them, I pushed them away as hard as I possibly could. No matter how hard I tried, for that 2 weeks adjustment period, those horrible thoughts just kept pushing back and sneaking into my mind.
**That little voice presented me with such an "easy way out" of my suffering.**
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Easy Way Out
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This first poem was written a year ago, on 19/04/2022. I think it goes without saying the desperation here was screaming. This was actually the first poem I wrote in my life, originally in Portuguese. Something I thought to be impossible for me to do. ***OH, life and its little twists, right?*** It might be something that lyrically and technically doesn't make sense for a poem building, but they were my most inner and deep thoughts expressed.
I guess this poem makes more sense in my native language than when translated to English but I wanted my word to be understood by everyone so here goes nothing 😆
##### Panic spurts
##### in the snap of a finger,
##### My broken thoughts
##### revealing my frights.
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##### This anxiety that builds within
##### by constant disorganization.
##### Is it my mind that stimulates
##### this fulminating ache?
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##### Where does it come from
##### That I do not know...
##### Pieces of me that perish,
##### but it was I who gave them!
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##### This giving without limits
##### that I don't know how to avoid,
##### jumping between hunches
##### dodging what I have to face.
Translated with [DeepL](www.DeepL.com/Translator) (free version)
##### O pânico despoltado
##### num estalar de dedos,
##### O meu pensamento destroçado
##### revelando os meus medos.
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##### Esta ansiedade que se acumula
##### pela desorganização constante.
##### Será a minha mente que estimula
##### esta dor fulminante?
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##### De onde é que isto vem
##### Isso eu não sei...
##### Pedaços de mim que perecem,
##### Mas fui eu que os dei!
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##### Esse dar sem limites
##### que não sei como evitar,
##### Saltitanto entre palpites
##### evitando o que tenho de enfrentar.
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A new way
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Now, a year later, I have stopped my medication and I'm feeling great! I've regained my will to live and I've recently made another poem that I'm especially proud of. I've been to Mexico recently on a family holiday - *that's a story for another post* - and I've written this poem there, sometime between 6 am while looking at the beautiful sunrise (as you can see in my photo above).
##### Pensamentos que fluem
##### como uma corrente,
##### Ideias que evoluem
##### A partir de uma nascente.
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##### Clareza da mente
##### nunca antes vivida.
##### Cada vez mais se sente
##### A menina perdida.
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##### Tão bom que é
##### sentir o potencial,
##### Talvez tenha agora fé
##### de que ele é substancial.
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##### A curiosidade natural
##### que surje da exploração.
##### Aquela tão essencial
##### à nova criação.
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##### Sem amarras e preconceitos
##### nem culpas ou anseios.
##### Que bom que é este feito
##### de pensar sem receios.
##### Thoughts that flow
##### like a current,
##### Ideas that develop.
##### from a nascent .
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##### Clarity of mind
##### never experienced before.
##### More and more one feels
##### the lost little child.
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##### So good it is
##### to feel the potential,
##### I may now have faith
##### that he is substantial.
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##### The natural curiosity
##### that arises from exploration.
##### The one so essential
##### to the new creation.
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##### Without chains and prejudices
##### or guilt or longing.
##### How good is this achievement
##### of thinking without hesitation.
Translated with [DeepL](www.DeepL.com/Translator) (free version)
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Final notes 💭
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That's it today from me! I always feel a bit hesitant to post with translation because the meaning of the words and their flow is always a bit lost from the main language. However, I also learned to trust my instinct to share when I feel like it, so here it goes 😊.
I hope you enjoyed going through my little creations and I thank you for your time reading them 🤗.
Until next time 🙌👋
Text dividers made by @cryptosharon and free to use All images are my own unless stated otherwise