I am not an overtly optimistic person; I tend to ride the line between realist and pessimist 👎 But over the past few days, I have been trying to keep hope alive, because this is something I cannot afford to lose.
Unfortunately, it is something that I tend to lose, regardless...
It's getting a bit repetitive! 😅 (sorry) but for over a year, we have been trying to conceive a baby. We had a first ever miscarriage back in July, 2024, and despite our active, consistent efforts, we have not been able to conceive. Like many, we have no answers for any of it: I am an overall healthy, active person; no preexisting health conditions; all levels normal; we have conceived two beautiful daughters effortlessly...
It has been my greatest wish for a YEAR. Previously, I took it for granted, but this time, I have promised to be vigilant.
(Me, pregnant with our first daughter ❤️)
I am currently several days late. For someone who is always on time, AND just gained 10+ lbs., this is great news! 🙏 (Weight gain typically results in a regular, or even early, cycle). I haven't felt much cramping. I am trying to be optimistic that something could be manifesting, but past experience has taught me to stay grounded...
At the same time, I don't know who I could share this granted wish with. We told immediate family immediately once we found out for ourselves, at around 6-weeks-old. Unfortunately, I passed the baby at around 9 weeks. We had hardly known our baby for a month...
I know that a lot of people say wait to share until the second trimester, but I would be torn between sharing our hope with others, or keeping it amongst ourselves... It is something that should be celebrated, and prayed over as soon as possible! 😩
But because of what limited people and places I have to share these thoughts, I do it here. Please, keep us in your thoughts. Please pray for us 🙏 Every morning this week that I have woken up, I am terrified that my dream will be crushed.