I’ve noticed that humans as a whole have the ability to tolerate so many things, things that are downright crazy and insane, and oftentimes even dangerous to them. They tolerate it and accept it as a way of life for themselves. They know that it shouldn’t be so, they know that they should never let such things happen to them, because, in all actuality, it’s not normal.
Yet, you see them sticking to it. You see the lies they tell themselves and how they manage to convince themselves to keep pushing regardless of all the rubbish that keeps getting in their way. And in the end, what do we get? Unhappy people who are stuck in places they’d rather not be.
But eventually, they always get to the end of their rope. And most of the time, what triggers this is not usually as massive as every other atrocity that they’ve had to endure from the same person. It’s just like enduring it when someone is playing around with guns, knives, and bombs. You don’t like it, but you don’t say anything. However, when they start playing with sticks, which is considerably less dangerous when compared to the others, you suddenly flare up. That’s how it can be.
I think I mentioned the story of a neighbor of mine a while back who was dating a chronic cheat. As in, the guy was so blatant in his act of infidelity that he didn’t even bother to hide it from her. He openly cheated on her with her own friends. He destroyed so many of her friendships, she was ready to cut off all contact with everyone else in her life, but that wasn’t enough for this guy. She was blind to all the red flags this guy was swimming in. As in, someone who flirts with your own sisters right in your presence, if this is not a deal-breaker, what then are you looking for?
She eventually broke up with him, though, and you know what caused it? It was still the same infidelity, but this was with a total stranger. Like, it was as if for the first time, the guy took an interest in someone that wasn’t connected to the lady, and went for someone that had nothing at all to do with her. On a norm, that should have been less painful than him cheating with her best friends and flirting with her sisters. But for some reason, it was the trigger she needed. It opened the scales in her eyes, and she called it quits right there and then.
Or what about having siblings who are totally dependent on you without a care for how you’re coping? They just keep billing you and demanding, even if you don’t have a job. They want, and keep wanting, but none of them are there for you when you need them. They ask for huge sums of money, and you give it to them, often times putting your own life on hold because of them. But one day, they ask for something ridiculously cheap and tiny, and it infuriates you. When your able-bodied brother asks you for money to buy his own boxer shorts, or your grown sister asks you for money to buy her own bathing soap… everything suddenly becomes clearer.
What happens in these instances? Is it that the epiphany finally came? No, that’s not the case. It’s always been in the making, it just took a long time for the cup to fill. Everything that has been happening has just been piling on top, everything they endured was just being stored somewhere, gathering weight. And the seemingly ‘tiny’ act was just what set it all off. It’s the trigger, and everything that happened in the past was the actual dynamite. Because when it happens, it opens your eyes, and then you look back to the past and realize just how you’ve been acting.
Everyone has different tolerance ranges. Some have zero tolerance, the minute you mess up is the same minute they give it to you hot! For others, they only give you one chance to hurt them, and you only get their forgiveness once. If it happens again, you’re out. And for others, they own the Central Bank of Forgiveness. They’ll keep forgiving you for whatever you do… until that fateful day when the scales fall from their eyes, and they’ll just stop forgiving…
In a nutshell, let’s just try to be good people. That shouldn’t be so hard. We should treat people how we want to be treated, because honestly, many of us have no idea what we put other people through. So once in a while, we should try putting ourselves in their shoes. Maybe it’ll help us be better people.
Thank you for reading. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below, I would love to know what you’re thinking. Till we meet in the next post.
N.B: All images used in this post are mine. The thumbnail was designed using Canva.
