Dinner time in movies often looks like a sacred family tradition: everyone gathered around the table, talking, laughing, and catching up on life. For some families like mine, that's a reality. For others, it's more of a goal than a habit.
When I was a kid, we had a strong tradition in my family that no matter how busy you are, you must come home to eat, and the time is always set. Nobody, not even my father, dared to come late. If you will miss dinner, there must be a strong reason for that; it was a law set by my grandma then.
Every time we are going to have jollof rice for dinner in my house, you would think that it will be put in a separate plate for us to eat. But no, my late grandma would bring out a stainless tray, put the rice in it, place our meat in a small bowl, and allow the rice to cool down. Then she would ask us to wash our hands and start eating from that tray.
We were six children in number, but there is always fighting and disagreement, especially when it comes to sharing meat. You will hear cries echoing from all corners, because there will always be someone who feels cheated.
I loved it then; it bonded us together - the fighting, the argument of who was senior by month or even weeks - just so we could pick meat first and last. I was a slow eater, but I learned how to eat fast because of this. Anytime they ate more than me, I would cry to my grandma; she would say, 'Try and be smart like your cousins.'
I was the first in my family to come up with sharing food with our clothes for the females. One day, my mother cooked jollof rice as usual, but I didn't know how to eat hot food, unlike my male cousins who were born divers; it's like they have a thermocool in their mouths and hands. That day we ate, but I was hiding my food inside my clothes.
It was fun, but then I learned how to eat fast and not be picky because what the prepares is what everybody will eat; if not, you will sleep hungry.In my family now, we still have these kinds of dinners more often now when everyone's schedule isn't so hectic. But over time, things changed; we all got busier. Some of us relocated far away, and others work late or have evening commitments, maybe at church, work, or something else. The last time we all had a meal together at the same time was during a festive holiday like Christmas or New Year. And sometimes Easter. It felt warm and refreshing, like a pause button was hit on everything else just to be present.
What’s stopping us from making it a tradition?
Probably the same thing stopping many families: time, routine, and maybe a bit of forgetfulness about how important it really is. It's not that we don't care. It's just that life gets fast, and slowing down enough to sit and share a meal takes intentional effort. But maybe it's time to try again. Even if not every night, starting with one day a week could bring that tradition back to life. Because really, it's not just about the food, it's about the connection and the memories we share.
Images are Ai generated
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