I recently had some experiences regarding birthdays that made me think that not everything is as it seems and not everyone enjoys their birthdays like i do or like other people do. To dive deeper, i will tell you about what i usually do on my birthday, some of these experiences that i mentioned earlier and share some examples of how people feel alone during their birthdays.
So to begin with, when the time of my birthday comes i always try to spend that day with my family and that includes cousins, uncles and grandparents. I don't do anything fancy, i simply order something to eat altogether and then have my birthday cake, everyone sings me the birthday song and then cake time. Now, some days after and before my birthday i tend to go out with my friends and depending on my budget, we will go to a tavern and eat.
Now let's go on to the recent experiences that i had. To begin with, a friend of mine had a birthday a couple of weeks ago and while we were talking about what we would do and if he wanted something in particular as a present, he said to me that he didn't care anymore about birthdays and that it was just another day for him.
That ofc didn't mean that we wouldn't go out or that he didn't want a present or something but i think that growing up and due to him having only me as a friend and his girlfriend, he somehow felt a bit sad of his situation. Note that his girlfriend is the exact opposite, the most extroverted person i have ever seen, so seeing her enjoying her birthday that much and having like 30-40 people in her party i think that she felt sad for his situation.
I also have seen a lot of people that i know posting photos and videos on social media about their birthdays with cool cakes, in cool places and full of people, only to find out that they are actually feeling empty. These were not "real friends" or "family" and they basically had a fake smile throughout the day.
Last but not least, i was in Japan a couple of months ago and in a cafeteria, there was a young girl drinking and eating alone. At some point, the waitress brought her a small small cake with a candlestick and told everyone to basically say to her Happy birthday and sing the song. The girl, for reasons unknown, was alone and had none to spend her birthday with. Btw i did some research after that and read the following:
Solo dining is rising sharply. In the U.S., solo dining reservations rose 29% over two years; in Japan, 23% dine alone regularly—signaling increasing comfort with being alone in social contexts.
Let's move on to how and why now. First and foremost Japan has a unique culture that, even though it has thousands of good things, also leads to many people being distant from each other. Most of the other countries have started facing similar issues.
Especially, with the rise of social media and the fake way of living that people tend to try and obtain without caring about what this entails and where does this lead, they end up feeling empty and alone.
In general, human relationships have gone from worse to worst in my opinion and that's why many people feel or are alone during their Birthdays. Keep in mind that as i said in the title not only are some people alone during their birthday they also feel like it. That means that even if you have a lot of people around you during that time, it doesn't mean that you will feel happy and full.
Deep down and even though we don't want to accept it, we know when most people around us are actual friends or not but we tend to ignore it, resulting in long-term emptiness and loneliness. I personally don't like people being alone during their birthdays, that's why when a friend or a family member has birthday i will try to make my schedule around it and be there for him/her!