Between Curiosity and Trust: The Question of Kids’ Privacy

Taking a flashback to when I was still a bit small, I could remember that anytime my parents or my sisters knocked on the door of my room, even before I answered to say come in, I already heard the sound of the door being opened. And writing this Hive Learner prompt made me realize that most parents, and I cannot categorically say it is a Nigerian thing because I do not know how other countries also do it, but here, most parents do not prioritize privacy for their kids. Maybe, according to them, it was a way of safeguarding and showing us love back then. But when I reminisce, I get to know that privacy is not about keeping our beloved family away; it is about establishing security and educating on accountability. Do all these young ones also need privacy? Definitely, they need it as much as we do because they are humans like us too, and when they reach a certain stage, they will also start claiming their territory. The complicated aspect of this is that parents should be aware of when to allow the children to be alone and when to check up on what they are doing.  In some homes in my country or something that I have seen, most parents are concerned that if their kids have a lot of privacy, those kids will keep things from them, which will lead them to make some bad decisions. Well, I can bloody say that even though they are being monitored from now till eternity, they will keep what they want to keep, and life is also about keeping the balance and that those kids should be allowed to also make mistakes for them to learn, think, and grow. I know of this parent who still watches all the activities of their boy. The father and the mother take turns going through his phone thoroughly, reading through every one of his chats and browser history, even using their Gmail as the major login account on his phone, and then randomly check on him in his school. When I heard that, I just smiled because, to them, they might be securing or protecting him, but to that young man, that is the beginning of him keeping secrets from them; rebellion will start to set in, and he will be keeping his distance from them because his relationship with them will be shaky; there is going to definitely be a lack of trust. ||| |-|-| ||| I am not yet a parent, but someday I will be. But what I have gotten to know is that privacy and guidance are two different things, and when I give my unborn kids privacy, it does not mean that I am neglecting the act of giving guidance. For the kids who are still very young, it could be something like opening the doors of their rooms halfway, and for those who have become teenagers, it could be respecting their space by staying out of their chats and talks with their friends. I have come to think of it this way: when we talk about privacy and protection, it should be about guiding the kids in the right direction where they can make the best choices and not controlling them, because, like I said earlier, overprotection can lead to a breach of trust, and those kids might not be responsible or even lack the moral boundaries when he or she grows up because his freedom was taken away from him when he was a child. It might not be in all cases, but mostly in some cases. And I think that parents should be able to give their kids enough space to breathe, and they should not just look after them alone. --- Thank you for reading. > _{Images created by MetaAi}