Playing around with my love
It's one thing to decide how you'll live your life; it's another thing to follow through on that choice.
Growing up, I had a lot of issues, honestly, because I was always super friendly, and even though it's nice, it comes with a whole load of problems..
When u newly entered middle school, my resolve was to be friendly and to be liked by everyone. I was so inexperienced then.
As a result of my resolve I didn't act natural and went out of my way unnecessarily to please people, I felt like this would make people like me and they would be my friend.
I refused to accept the simple truth that it's not possible for everyone to like y u, it was not possible.
I had a friend in middle school who eventually turned out to be my best friend or so I felt, we we're close and almost inseparable, she was a nice person to be friends with, little did I know that I had jealous people lying around, unhappy to see me happy, so when I was in the final part of middle school, they began saying bad and untrue things behind my back to her, she didn't confirm from me and slowly she was becoming distant.
The last straw for her was when the guy she liked asked me out in front of the whole class, I was stunned I knew she liked him, and I had done everything to stay away from him, but he still has to do this in front of the class, I didn't know what to say, I had a big problem, I didn't know how to say ***"NO"*** to someone, if became part of me and it was very bad.
After I kept quiet and didn't give the guy any reply, he simply told me to think about it and left. My best friend came with three other girls.
***"I'm sure you feel like a princess now!"*** She said
I stared at her...
***"What do you mean, I know you like him and I'm not accepting"*** I replied
She scoffed at my reply ***"No need to act so nice, not like I've ever wanted to be your friend, I was just using you to get him, but now you're of no use, from today we are no more friends!"** She said
The reality hit me hard, she betrayed me, and exposed all my secrets to her Ill friends.
I had trust issues since that day and had a problem trusting people, but still, if you were easy to talk to, I would open up, but I ended up getting hurt again and again, and hated letting go of my friends.
I thought my world was breaking to pieces until I met her, Doris. She was a beautiful soul, and we usually saw each other but never really talked, but one day we clicked and I learnt a whole lot from her.
You mustn't please everybody, even displeasing yourself to do so; it's not possible for everyone to love you.
I learnt from her to be firm and say no to anyone if their request was absurd, I learnt certain behavioral patterns, and this helped me a lot; I found myself happier and content.
From there we both became best of friends and we've been like that ever since, the relationship became mutual and we love each other so much, she's my favorite person.
I took a leaf out of her book, and it was more beneficial to me than I imagined. She's still there for me whenever I'm down, and I'm there for her too.
I'm grateful I met someone like her.
Image of me and my best friend, our ❤️ hearts are together