A Waste Of Time

“Please teach me” her face lit up, her voice was filled with so much excitement and I was tricked to know what is unreal and genuine.  **Image generated using AI** At first I didn't give in, giving so many excuses all at once not because I didn't want to help but I didn't want to count it as a waste of my time. Time is money and I should make every second of it count. I didn't want to be seen as a bad person, the one who holds back knowledge and is selfish enough not to share but I shared with her anyway isn't it left for her to do her research? I believe, if you want something then you have to work for it. I took a deep breath shutting down my laptop to give her my full attention shutting that voice that always spoke the reality. It was all going to amount to a waste of time. I sat close to her, my eyes unfading as I gave her a run down of what she is about to embark on hoping she was going to lose interest or something but she was enthusiastic about it and I could see her eyes lit up with so much excitement. That was deceiving, I should have known but being a girl who wants to help a friend I was too excited to help. “How do we start? I could create an account?” She asked standing up to get her phone where it was plugged. I rolled my eyes catching my breath from hours of speaking. I was already exhausted and the mental picture of onboarding her was already draining before I could even start. She sat back next to me stretching her phone to me. “Can we do this tomorrow?” I tried every means to convince her so we could start the onboarding tomorrow but she obviously didn't want that. I excuse myself to take a glass of water and take a bit of a walk outside and allow the cool breeze of the summer to drain off my insecurity. I was sure someone who loved to help others but I didn't want that to be taken for granted. I cursed my mouth for being too big, I could have kept this to myself but I was so happy I couldn't contain the joy anymore. I walked back in trying to avoid body contact with patients who stood at the hallway, mostly blocking the walking path. I finally succeeded in getting to the office to see her staring down on her phone. I have asked her to download a few apps before I left to get some fresh air. “Im done” her eyes quickly lit as it sat on me the moment I walked through the door. “Perfect” I sat close to her and took her phone to go through the paranton section of opening up an account. It was my first time and with little knowledge I have gotten from a few of my friends I was in communication with. I navigated through some certain areas but I got stuck at some point. Communicated with a friend who was of help and it finally worked perfectly fine. Taught her the procedure of making her introduction post and yeah she was excited doing it. She needed permission in every picture she wanted to post. “Is this okay? Can I go for this?” I nodded exhausted to even speak up. “Can you also help me with mine?” another friend of mine Ngozi, who is lean and beautiful with nice curves at the right places. “We can do yours tomorrow I'm so tired” She agreed to me but deep down I knew it was all a mirage. It was just pressure to belong because she saw others doing so but I never discouraged her; rather I encouraged her to be the best version of herself and I was willing to assist anytime they needed my help. And I did exactly what I promised but then when she began to downvote all her posts, she wasn't getting anything much as I tried to encourage her to still stick to it, it was like pouring water on a stone. She didn't just stop, she abandoned the account and it was so draining my time was so a waste. Regret! I did at some point and for Ngozi she never had the interest to, for her writing was a big task and draining. It wasn't her thing and I totally understand. “Girl, if writing isn't your thing, then do what you love.”