I think I talked before about my adolescence, it is a time that I did not like very much, there were too many fears that kept me for years in my comfort zone, that safe place where my parents seemed to be everything. If I could go back in time and talk to my 15 year old self I would warn him not to choose a career in computer science, that it would make me lose valuable years of what would be our real profession; but more important is the advice I would give myself, simply: Nobody Is Watching!.
A lot of things at the beginning of our adult life depends on the education we were given, mine was very good, but I was overprotected, which made me hit even harder with what life is really about. In my teenage years fears reigned, I thought that everyone was watching me, that everyone was judging me and that my actions really negatively affected my future, but that's not the case, at least not the silly actions like disobeying my parents or being bad at math or physics. It's amazing how at that time in my life I thought that one wrong step would mean the end of the world, and now I know that really nobody is watching, people just have time to mind their own business.
I don't even have photos from my adolescence, and not so much because we were a family that couldn't afford digital cameras (which was also a reality), but I was so unhappy with myself and my physical appearance that if I could I wouldn't have taken pictures of myself, and if I did I'm sure I wouldn't be smiling like in these selfies I'm sharing today. Yes, in high school there really was a lot of evil, students who only dedicated themselves to making other people's lives miserable, but today I realize that it was all superficial and that the evil I am talking about was just their way of defending themselves from their own lives. I was never intent on hurting anyone, and in the process I hurt myself by holding back from experiences because I felt it was a world that was not for me. I literally felt that everyone was watching my every move, my parents, my uncles, my aunts, my cousins, my teachers, our neighbors, the people at church, and yes, possibly to some extent I was right, I was still a minor, but just like today, it was only for correction or gossip, but I was always the master of my life and I didn't know it.
Nowadays there are few things that embarrass me, and anyway they are not so embarrassing, they are just mine and I carry them inside, but they do not limit me. There may be people who do follow your every move for some reason, but I don't care, we shouldn't care, we should just live life, in our own way, without hurting others, seize every moment as if it were the last of our lives, in fact I need to do it, feel it and believe it, because I owe it to myself after being my own jailer in the past. Nobody Is Watching!!!, I think he means that no one really cares if you succeed or fail, everyone is in their own personal battle, I don't even know if there is anyone actually reading this post, but I write it anyway, maybe it will be useful to someone, or maybe it will seem silly to others, but I don't care 😅 it's my blog, my life, my thoughts, and I wish I had understood this from an early age. I'm not complaining about my life, the road to get to where I am today has been beautiful in retrospect, but how great it would be to have the power to go back in time and tell that 15 year old boy not to waste his time in sadness, that yes he would have a happy ending with the perfect woman ❤️
I don't even have photos from my adolescence, and not so much because we were a family that couldn't afford digital cameras (which was also a reality), but I was so unhappy with myself and my physical appearance that if I could I wouldn't have taken pictures of myself, and if I did I'm sure I wouldn't be smiling like in these selfies I'm sharing today. Yes, in high school there really was a lot of evil, students who only dedicated themselves to making other people's lives miserable, but today I realize that it was all superficial and that the evil I am talking about was just their way of defending themselves from their own lives. I was never intent on hurting anyone, and in the process I hurt myself by holding back from experiences because I felt it was a world that was not for me. I literally felt that everyone was watching my every move, my parents, my uncles, my aunts, my cousins, my teachers, our neighbors, the people at church, and yes, possibly to some extent I was right, I was still a minor, but just like today, it was only for correction or gossip, but I was always the master of my life and I didn't know it.
Nowadays there are few things that embarrass me, and anyway they are not so embarrassing, they are just mine and I carry them inside, but they do not limit me. There may be people who do follow your every move for some reason, but I don't care, we shouldn't care, we should just live life, in our own way, without hurting others, seize every moment as if it were the last of our lives, in fact I need to do it, feel it and believe it, because I owe it to myself after being my own jailer in the past. Nobody Is Watching!!!, I think he means that no one really cares if you succeed or fail, everyone is in their own personal battle, I don't even know if there is anyone actually reading this post, but I write it anyway, maybe it will be useful to someone, or maybe it will seem silly to others, but I don't care 😅 it's my blog, my life, my thoughts, and I wish I had understood this from an early age. I'm not complaining about my life, the road to get to where I am today has been beautiful in retrospect, but how great it would be to have the power to go back in time and tell that 15 year old boy not to waste his time in sadness, that yes he would have a happy ending with the perfect woman ❤️
