The year 2025 has been a challenging year for me. I got to face a whole lot of things that have changed my perspective about life and taught me that life isn’t just black and white, it’s in between, let’s call it grey. Yeah Life is grey, only pretty with the right combinations, not so pretty on its own and would definitely mess you up if you make the wrong choices. I got to see first hand how my little choices affect my daily life and everything around me. You know it’s different when you talk about it from when you truly experience these things and this year I got different rewards for different things, some where rewards I liked and some were rewards I wished I never had to experience, either way, I got rewards for my actions even the one from years ago. To be honest I am not sure I can even be detailed in my life experience for 2025, but I will try to be as much as I can as I am still going through all the experiences. I wouldn't say I am in a better place yet, but I will say I am learning to survive.
This year came with a lot for me, I lost quite a lot of assets, I gained a few also. I lost quite a lot of money, I gained new business experiences from Ideas I had, I lost my faith, still in the process of finding it back, attempted suicide at a point, was saved, found help, found hope again and now I am trying to get myself together again. It’s okay to say this was a really rough year with a lot of ups and downs, but I am glad to be where I am and not in the grave. I remember how much I was looking forward to getting married to the love of my life this year, but unfortunately that plan might have to be on hold because most of the things I had put in place last year are nowhere to be found. It’s not easy building again and from scratch, but I am grateful for the strength of youth because if the things that have happened to me now happened in old age, starting over would be nearly impossible. I would say I am lucky to have people around who decided that they will be there for me no matter what, they gave me the strength to keep going and I am grateful to have them.
If there is one thing I am looking forward to this year, it is a sense of stability. This is not just about my finances, but also my work, relationship, family, spiritual life and mental health. I want to be able to wake up in the morning and not feel like I just finished lifting a mountain, I want peace in my mind, body and soul, not worrying where the next meal will come from or the next bill to pay. My partner has complained about changes in my attitude and me not being the guy she knew years back, and I want that to change too. I want to bring joy, laughter and motivation to all those around me. It’s a process I know, and I will need to find a balance, I just hope I can do that before the end of the year.
##### PICTURE CREDIT IS MINE
>THIS IS MY RESPONSE TO HIVE LEARNER'S [PROMPT](https://discord.com/channels/928986840747372636/929001473231183873/1412698798437830730) FOR WEEK 181 EPISODE 2
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