From the moment we are born, our society has expectations of us. We have realistic standards that are expected of us to fulfill. “Son, this is what success looks like.” Go to school, get a degree, land a good job, own a home, marry early, have kids, stay fit, be happy, be rich, and all must be accomplished before the age of 30. I mean, lol, there is so much expectation there; I just listed the common one.
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But the question is at what points do these expectations stop being motivational and start being unrealistic standards?
We live in a world where everyone seems to be competing for the perfect lifestyle which is hard to achieve with the current situation of the economy. Social media has even added fire to it they make us believe it is possible to have flawless bodies, perfect relationships, luxury lifestyles, and “self-made” success stories flood our screens daily. But the truth is we have all forgotten behind those videos we watched they are filtered, edited, or simply staged, and yet most of us measure our lifestyle against these illusions and forget that reality is real.
For we young people today these constant changes can feel suffocating. A student who doesn't come out with top grades is seen as lazy or someone who chooses peace over a high-paying job but a toxic job is called unambitious. A woman who doesn't marry early is judged as past her prime. A man who is struggling financially is labelled as a failure in society. All these things come from the standards society created and yet only a few people ever meet them. Sometimes we tend to forget the grace one has another doesn't have yet we condemn them as a failure not everyone born is bound to make it in society.
The truth is our realities are not the same nor should our standards be. Someone born in a wealthy family has more privilege than someone born into a poor home. Someone battling mental health can't be expected to move at the same pace as someone normal. When society uses the same standards for all it fails to see people as individuals with different unique circumstances and timelines.
So when do societal standards become unrealistic?
It is when people who set the standards stop encouraging growth and start causing harm. When their expectations push people towards anxiety, depression, and self-hate hate they are no longer standards but burdens.
Perhaps we have asked ourselves whether standards are unrealistic to me it who sets them and why we obey them. Those standards come from generation lineages, family Expectation, Your community's expectations.
Maybe it's high time we redefined what it means to live well not through society's expectations but through our own. Success shouldn't be about comparison but contentment. It should be about what we truly want not some society forcing their standards and expectations on us. I think am able to give a clear explanation.
Thanks for reading…
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