Great book to read and learn the impresindible value of self-esteem
Self-love is a dam against mental suffering. Love yourself not it is only the point of reference to know how much you should love others ("Love your neighbor as yourself "), but it seems to act as a protective factor for diseases psychological and an element that generates well-being and quality of life. Activating all available self-esteem or loving the essentials of oneself is the first step towards any type of psychological growth and personal improvement. And I do not mean the dark side of self-esteem, narcissism and the fascination of the ego, to feel unique, special and above others; I'm not talking about "love" blind and unbridled by the "I" (egotism), but the genuine ability to recognize, without shame or fear, the strengths and virtues that we possess,integrate them to the development of our life and turn them towards others in an effective and compassionate way. Loving oneself, despising or ignoring others is presumption and exclusion; love the others, despising oneself, is lack of self-love. "Fall in love with you" means: "Love yourself and love yourself honestly." Persevere in being (conatus), as Baruch Spinoza said, to defend individual existence and bring out what best of everyone. Loving oneself is also encouraging healthy self-preservation, such as the Stoics promoted, and sought the greatest pleasure and health possible, as stipulated by Epicurus. Loving oneself is considered worthy of the best, strengthening self-respect and giving oneself the opportunity to be happy just by the fact, and without more reason, to be alive. Love begins at home. Your first love is the one that is addressed to yourself, and in that first idyll you will learn to love existence or to hate it. How to open the doors to the love of those around you if despise or do not accept your being, or if you are ashamed to exist? A patient destroyed by depression He told me: "I'm sorry, but ... I'm ashamed to be alive." Will there be greater decadence of being? A) Yes As you do not attack or you get rid of those you love, do not do the same with your person. Be friends with Self is the first step towards good self-esteem. To love is to seek the good of the other and enjoy it, that your pain hurts us and its joy cheers us, and with self-love something similar happens: if you do not forgive yourself, if it bothers you to be with yourself, if you do not support yourself and you despise yourself, then do not you you love! Sometimes they ask me if it is possible to hate oneself, and my answer is categorical: "For course, and with what intensity! " Even to the point of wanting to disappear from the face of land and act accordingly.
Many times we rejoice in self-inflicted pain. They tell that a lady was on a train and, at three o'clock in the morning, while most were asleep, he began to complain loudly: "What a thirst I have, my God! How thirsty I am, my God! " And again. His insistence woke up several of the passengers, and the one next to him went to get two glasses of water and brought them to him: "Take, madam, calm your thirst and so we all sleep. " The lady drank them quickly and the people settled down to resume your rest. Everything seemed to have returned to normal, until after a few minutes The lady was heard again saying: "How thirsty I was, my God! How thirsty I was, my God! " We incorporate psychological punishment into our lives from a young age without realizing it and as if it was a normal and even desirable facet; In short, we join him. We rejoice in suffering or we put candles. Sometimes we behave as if self-punishment were a virtue because "tempers the soul", and although it is true that the effort to reach the goals is important personal, one thing is the constructive self-criticism and another the ruthless self-criticism that hits us and it sinks us It is one thing to accept the necessary and necessary suffering, and quite another to get used to the pain that we masochistically propitiate ourselves for the sake of "cleaning up faults" or "treating to be worthy "for someone to love us. The findings made in the field of cognitive psychology in the last twenty years clearly show that the negative view you have of yourself is a determining factor for that appear psychological disorders such as phobias, depression, stress, anxiety, insecurity interpersonal, psychosomatic alterations, couple problems, low academic performance and work, substance abuse, body image problems, inability to regulate emotions and many more. The conclusion of the specialists is clear: if the self-esteem does not have enough strength, we will live badly, we will be unhappy and anxious. This book is aimed at those people who do not love themselves enough, who they live encapsulated, tied to irrational and inconsiderate norms with themselves. As well is aimed at those who knew how to love themselves at some time and have forgotten to do it the rigors of life or racing rampant for survival, where you put yourself in background, as if it were disposable material. The proposal of these pages is simple and complex at the same time: "Fall in love with you; be brave; begins the romance with yourself, in an 'I sustained ', that makes you happier every day and more resistant to the ravages of everyday life. "
Source: book enamorate of you, walter riso Image source: google images