It’s that time of year again. It’s Yom Kippur. At sunset today starts the holiest day in the Jewish religious calendar and a time for confessing our failings and our fallings short to the Eternal One. It’s the day when Jews consider as the last point in the year when we can appeal to the Eternal One to be sealed in the book of life, where we fast and pray and look back at what we’ve done over the past year and what we have not done.
I look back at the past year and there’s much that I would have done differently. I’ve been quietly spoken when I should have shouted and shouted when I should have been more measured in what I say. I’ve spoken out in haste when I should maybe have waited for more information and been too cautious about speaking out when I should have launched some thermonuclear textual jerrids at my targets. I’ve been judgemental when I should not have been and not judgemental enough when confronted with genuine reasons for me to be judgemental.
My sins are not mine alone, everyone is guilty of something. We all fall short of perfection and all have had times when we want to just give up, lie down and not strive to achieve better. We don’t just fail as individuals but also fail as members of groups, which is why on Yom Kippur we confess sins that many of us would never dream of committing because someone in some part of the People of Israel may have done so. As Yom Kippur is a communal expression of repentance we have to accept that the community is not perfect and those imperfections need to be confessed to and given up to the Eternal One. At Yom Kippur we recognise that all have failed in some way and all should recognise that.
Personally I find Yom Kippur extremely stressful and not just for the abovementioned spiritual reasons. I find the fasting extremely challenging and constantly worry that my diabetes will cause me to curtail my fast for health reasons. I want to meet the goal of fasting for 25 hours with no food and no water but I get upset that my body can no longer easily cope with a fast and I have to continually monitor my blood sugar levels (which go haywire on YK) to make sure that I don’t slip below 2.5 and end up as a gibbering wreck needing the paramedics to shove a Glucagon injection into my bumcheeks (as happened to a diabetic ex-girlfriend of mine a few times).
Yom Kippur is difficult. It’s difficult physically for some of us, difficult mentally and difficult spiritually, but that’s also the point of the fast. It’s to mortify ourselves to show repentance.
To those of whom I have by error offended I say ‘Schlica’ or sorry. However there are those in my community who have taken the side of the enemy, the people who want me dead. I cannot apologise to them for my opinions about them and their actions and only the Eternal One can give absolution and can help them see the error of their ways. I will however not give up hope that those who have decided to take the path of a modern day ‘kapo’ will repent and I will continue to try to convince them with my words to take that path of repentance.
We are all too human and all too often make very human errors that need to be confessed and put right.
Yom Kippur is the day when we return to the Eternal One and hope that the time between this Yom Kippur and the next will be the time when we can be our truest and most righteous selves.
I wish all those who are marking Yom Kippur well over the fast. With luck, normal service on here should resume on the evening of the 2nd October.