Some marriages are like a ring of fire, it keeps burning till it accidentally consumes either both partners or one of them if not curtailed. Mr. and Mrs. Martin’s marriage could be likened to the scenario of the burning ring. Three years ago, they consummated their marriage in the church. In the presence of hundreds of people including their family members. After all protocols had been observed, the preacher then pronounced them husband and wife. With a slim book in his hand, which he had been reading from, he declared, “You may kiss your bride”. The whole building went agog, mothers who came with their children covered their eyes while the adults were full of excitement and happiness. Martin held his wife closer to himself, extended his left hand to her neck, while his right hand rested on her waist. He kissed her on the lips, and a music interlude brought the ceremony to an end. It was a glorious marriage, or call it a God ordained marriage, as most people saw it. Marriage of educated couples, people see it as the best of it all because it is assumed that with their levels of exposure and educational acumen, they should be able to keep their home tight. Moreover, when either of the couple is financially stable, then such a union happens to be the desire of many. Money was not a problem as Martin had worked in one of the oil companies in Nigeria for the past 10 years, while Comfort, his wife, had been a successful accountant working in one of the banks in the country. It was a marriage that was the most talked about in town.
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No one would imagine that such a marriage could have an issue, a very big one. It all happened that after two years of marriage, Martin lost his job. The oil company could no longer contain its workforce because of the debilitating effect of the economy; therefore, some staff were laid off, and Martin was unfortunate to be one of them. Initially, it wasn’t a problem because his wife had been supporting and taking up some financial responsibility in the family.
One fateful evening, the house had been so hot as a result of the burning afternoon sun, Martin took out a stool and sat on the veranda of the house, fiddling with his mobile phone and enjoying reels from Facebook feeds, and also eating fruit salad. His wife came back and caught his attention.
“Martin” she shouted. Martin was surprised as to why his wife had to call him by his name. This has never happened before. He had already got used to the name “baby”.
“Sweetheart, are you alright?” he enquired.
“Do I look sick”? She fired back, “Are you telling me that since I left this house in the morning, you’ve not done anything meaningful to yourself, and all you do is watch reels on Facebook?” She increased the fire.
Martin was still surprised as to what could have come over his wife to talk to him in such a disrespectful manner.
“Sweetheart” he called trying to calm her down
“Never call me sweetheart again, or I will change for you”, she interrupted him “I left the house to go and look for money, yet you could not clean the house and cook, so that I have what to eat”. The statement came as an arrow into the heart of Martin, he wanted to react, but he kept cool and walked past her to the kitchen and straight to the bedroom. His wife couldn’t stop talking while also following him.
“I cannot be the one to bring money and also be the one to take care of the chores, you should choose one or else I will choose for myself”, she said. At this point, Martin remained muted and silently dressed up to move out of the house.
This attitude of hers did not start recently, but Martin had been acting weird, not paying attention to details. Some weeks ago, she had sent Martin to the market to get things for dinner with a prompt to cook, but he didn’t read the meaning into it since it was as if he was helping his wife out. He also remembered how she stood against his younger siblings visiting the house. These and many more brought him to consciousness that his wife's strange behaviour could be a result of his losing his job and not being able to provide for the family. He thought of approaching his wife in her room and talking sense to her and also cautioning her on her recent behaviour before going out, but he decided to let it be.
The problem took a new fashion which almost led to physical confrontation. At this point, their pastor was informed and he invited both of them to his office. In his office, after the pastor had heard their complaint, he prayed for them and advised them on how to keep their home. “Marriage is for better and for worse, hence as a wife you must at all times cover the nakedness of your husband till he can stand again”, he said. Turning to Martin, he said, “Always endeavour to help your wife out whenever she needs help”. “I pray that the lord will grant you peace in your home” he said as he dismissed them.
It’s a quarter pass 9. O'clock pm and Comfort is not back home since morning, she left for work. Martin had been calling, but no response from her end. This has been her recent issue, coming home late from work. He reasoned, I will have to stop this nonsense before it gets out of hand, he thought of throwing her things out of the house, beating her up, none of which fit well with him; hence, he prayed that he get a job to gain his respect back. He was brought back to consciousness will a vehicle drove into the compound. His wife stepped into the house, pushed him aside and moved straight to her room, packing her bags and other kitchen stuff into the vehicle. Martin tried every effort to stop her but couldn’t. “I cannot be a wife and a husband at the same time in a house where a man claims to be head” she said as she closed the boot of the car and zoomed off.
A month and two weeks later, Martin’s company decided to reabsorb them into the work force of the company. When he received the mail, tears flowed through his eyes.