I've been thinking alot lately about human behaviour, and the root causes of why we behave as we do. I think it goes a long way to understanding, shifting blame away from the individual-in-history, and more to human beings as a species. It's not that we cannot help our behaviour, but that if we seek to understand it, we might be able to change it or at least have a little compassion for people who seem to act like assholes. Feeling anger, resentment and annoyance at people for what they do doesn't really serve us - it just turns to acid in our cells.

It started with a conversation in the staffroom during the week (actually, it began with something I read on Hive, but that's another story). Talking to a Japanese-Australian friend of mine (this will make sense in a minute), I was saying that it's a biological imperative to be kind to one another, and I can't understand people who aren't. Why are people so self interested? Greedy? Worse - uncaring about others? We see this with people in charge of schools that don't understand the difficulty of teaching, or with big companies who are more concerned with their bottom line than seeking to understand why their workforce might be deeply unhappy, and how changing the experience of their employees might help their profit margin.

Sometimes it feels as if the whole world cares more about itself that other people, and it feels that is why society appears to be disintegrating.

Surely, we were thinking, it's better for the individual to care about others, so they benefit from this relationship? A kind of 'you bring me berries, I bring you meat' kinda scenario? I clean your cave, you protect me from the sabretooth prick scratching at the door? I just foraged a whole heap of mushrooms, want some stew - if you don't mind just cutting me some firewood?

But eventually we got to the point where we were like wait - no, humanity also needs the people who stray from the community, and don't appear to have their best interests in mind. They're just as important.

They're the ones that tell us they saw another valley with better resources, or new fruits. They're the ones who innovate, forge new paths. World shakers.

I mean some are assholes or motivated by fame or money or don't think through the consequences of what they're doing (I'm sure there's a lot of regrets in tech right now) but the people who seem driven by forces I might not understand or relate to are just as valid in the world.

There's a Japanese concept my friend spoke about that helped me see the bigger picture.

He spoke about the idea of yoku, which essentially means “desire” or “drive.”, but that it isn't inherently bad - it's a hunger or driving force that propels you forward. Without it, we wouldn't get out of our caves in the morning and hunt the mammoth, and we'd starve. Yet if we have excessive drive, we suffer, and by extension, so do the people around us.

There’s a traditional idea that yoku isn’t inherently bad because it can be the hunger or striving that pushes you forward. If you don't have desire, you lack motivation at all. However, if it’s excessive, it leads to suffering - both for yourself, and others.

So balance is needed.

So it's not that I'm angry at the individualists and the people that forge ahead on their own at the expense of relationships and caring for the tribe, it's that the excess upsets me.

Profits over people. The moon before Earth. Business before people are supported to do their job. Money over everything.

But then that's the modern world, isn't it, all unbalanced and teetering on it's feet.

With Love,

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