It’s been 3 days since the festival ended and I still have so much to say about it. I’ve already talked about the music and atmosphere, the audience and my own personal reaction to it. But actually I learned a whole lot over the course of 3 days, much of which will help me moving forward.
I learned that I am ready to travel as long as I plan well enough. After a 6 year haitus I finally feel the energy and drive to explore, although it still feels much more difficult than before.
I learned about booking hotels and getting taxis in Japan. The difference in pricing between busy season and off season is getting more and more pronounced. If i want to travel for cheap, I’ve got to keep an eye out for the right week, and if I do, I can travel much more often without a problem.
I learned that although the festival is an amszing experience and that people are more free there, they still aren’t comfortable starting conversations with random strangers without alcohol present. They may be more open but there is a more important factor at play.
In Japan you are treated in accordance with the group you belong to. It’s not easy to interface individual to individual. People will treat you like the company you belong to, or a member of the bar you frequent, perhaps as a fan of the band you love the most, or in a music festival like this, it’s the group of friends you came with or are closest to.
This is regretable but it’s not as if I can change the culture with a snap of my fingers.
I had a very hard time making conversation with new people on my first two days when it was me and my partner and 3 friends who knew less than we did about the event. Everyone is friendly but they don’t give you a window to continue the conversation past a single sentence or two.
The rules don’t always apply when thr show is over and everyone is getting drunk but we don’t drink anymore and even if we did, 8 hours of music and THEN drinking and socializing, no thank you.
The third day I spent with friends from my neighborhood who were camping, unlike us, we stayed in a hotel. When i went to their tent village the rules suddenly changed. All conversation with new people became easy. People know that I was part of a group that they felt had a connection to their group and so they were more eager to talk to me.
Tribalism. A relic of the days of Samurai perhaps, where you were pledged to a house or you were considered a ronin, a wandering samurai, not to be trusted. I knew this applied to company people. I’ve only just realized that this cultute is strong enough that even freelancers and the counter culture can’t eacape it.
To some extent I think this phenomena exists everywhere but to different degrees. In the west it feels like the standard but its not hard to connect as individuals, especially when you find you have somethinf in common. In Japan it’s less about what you have in common and more about, not who you know, but what you belong to.
I always defend the idea of a tribe, I think it’s important to find people who give you a sense of belonging, but I despise the idea of closing off to people who don’t fit in to your tribe. Connection should be more about the vibes between two people, and we are all multifaceted so we should be free to conenct with people outside the tribe.
I realized that for better or worse, I’m married in a sense to my neighborhood and the people I’ve connected with there. What I do reflects upon them and what they do reflects upon me.
The only way to break this is to belong to more tribes than one which is socially acceptable nowadays but herein lies the problem. In Japan it takes much more time and commitment to eatablish yourself as part of the tribe. A few great conversations doesn’t cut it. You need to keep showing up, and not too infrequently. A year without contact and you might have to start over from square one. And building that connection can take months and many interactions with people.
I realized that even the connection with my tribe is strengthened through these outings, not in the town itself where everyone is stuck in their routine. If i want to connect with them I’ve got to go hiking with them or go to the beach or a festival like this.
Honestly it’s a bit of a headache for me because my favorite thing is to run into someone I am curious about and have a one on one real conversation with them. That’s not how it works here though, not broadly speaking. When I meet that same person in our regular music cafe spot, everyone talks with the group as a whole or goes to their phone to do their own thing.
I don’t like group conversations with 4+ people, they always tend towards shallow topics or gossip or complaining.
Luckily I have a shortcut.
I have music. That gives people a chance to take an interest in me without needing a long process of slowly slowly breaking the ice. And if anyone shows any interest I have a free pass to invite that person to become closer as a friend.
I also learned this festival that I am ready to step up my musicial activity. I am already among people that will understand and appreciate what I have to share but I’ve got to share it, and that means I’ve got to keep focusing on it. It’s been a little hard while traveling but as soon as I get back I want to throw myself into the music. I’ll plan a show for September as soon as I get back!
I feel new inspiration bubbling up from all these new experiences. August will mark a new beginning 🔥
Message from a Dream
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