Determined on NFT Showroom: https://nftshowroom.com/stellabelle/gallery/stellabelle_miscellany_determined Price: 300 Hive
The title, Determined describes that point in life when you say, “Enough is enough.”
10 years ago I changed my life and stopped being a doormat to the whims of others. My situation was pretty ugly, as I was in a terrible relationship with a sociopath who had brainwashed me.
That morning, when I realized I wanted my life back, I had had enough. I woke up really early, and I told my ex to get out of my house. I took my baby away from him, walked up to my parents bedroom and handed them my one-day old baby. Then I drove my ex to the bus station and paid for his ticket out of my city, and out of my life. He already had his escape planned out, so it wasn’t hard for him to leave us. It wasn’t easy. I was shaking and crying the whole way, but that day marked the beginning of me taking back my life.
For people like myself, who for whatever reason grew up placating and pleasing others at the expense of my own well-being, I encourage you to stop doing this. Choose the day you become determined. I get into more arguments and conflict now, but I will never go back to being a placating doormat. Confrontation is part of life. You cannot avoid it. You also cannot please everyone.
That’s my story.
I worked on this painting using all free digital tools: Gimp, Sculptris, Artbreeder and EZGif.com.
I came from the days of Napster, and to be honest, I don’t like paying for software. There are enough open-source free tools in existence, and I prefer using those. Sculptris is one of my secret programs that I think very few people know about. I learned about it when I took a 3D printing class.
Process
First thing I did was to create a new 3D model using Sculptris. I only have scratched the surface of this program, and until today I didn’t know it had different colored skins. I found this ultra colorful skin and created a 3D shape:
A few days ago I created an “angry girl” from Artbreeder. I had the intention of using this image to depict an Epstein victim, at the point she decides to come forward and expose the rich and powerful elites who abused her. That was my original intention:
Here’s a process image before I started drawing black lines and other details on the face:
As I was continuing to draw in details on this face, I became aware of it being a story about myself. This happens a lot with me. I start making art with some idea, but as more details emerge, it morphs into something personal.
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