This day in the lab was strange in many ways.
By automatism and habit, I started my daily work when I arrived, preparing reagents for today’s protocol. In no way did the cell cultures seeded in the experimental medium differ from the previous day. It’s always the first thing I check upon arrival, but progress has never been seen clearly. The difference, if it existed, was always subtly hidden in minimal changes at the molecular level, and in order to understand it, it is necessary to distinguish it in a more complicated way in relation to the quick and fleeting look that became a morning ritual for me after these months. I wasn’t alone on this project, of course, but I was alone today. We did not expect any unforeseen events, so I just came to take daily measurements, add reagents to the cells for cell growth, adjust the temperature and then I would go home.
Like I said, everything was just like I left late last night, when I went home. Everything was the same except the room temperature. It was crucial for this study that there were no temperature variations greater than 1 degree Celsius over 24 hours, however now the room temperature was at 22 degrees Celsius instead of 25 which is the ideal temperature for cell colony development. I quickly adjusted all the parameters to the desired level, hoping that this change in temperature did not cause any far-reaching consequences. Unfortunately, that is likely to have happened. That struck me, most of my studies were dedicated to this idea by my colleague and me, the idea of organ development in the medium. The idea to change the world of transplant medicine radically. We even gave the last money to rent the space and equipment we use now. In fact, no one but the two of us knew about our project.
After setting the parameters, I did not perform the usual cell culture checks. We tried to create heart valves from immature cells as well as parts of the lung parenchyma. I was in a moral and ethical gap, wondering again if I had unknowingly ruined years of planning and research by setting the temperature wrong.
I jerked myself suddenly out of what seemed to me to be too long thinking. Everything was exactly in its place, but some crumb of doubt did not give me peace. I did everything according to the protocol and checked everything down to the smallest detail. Everything was ideal, in theory we should have seen progress by now. We were pretty sure that every protocol we made was ideal for what we wanted to achieve. The reagents and media in which we tried to implement the idea were of the highest quality. But everything was still at the starting point.
I checked everything, twice, and went home.
The next day, on the way to work, Marcel and I discussed other possibilities, and were aware that if cell colonies did not start to grow in this way, we could come to terms with the fact that it was impossible to do at a given moment and that we had to focus on other ways to let us advance human science.
The shock was huge when we found the broken front door of the hangar where the laboratory was located. Inside, the temperature was reset to 22 degrees Celsius, and everything was perfectly clean and in place. Everything but cell colonies and protocol books. At that place, there was a letter on the counter, with the sigil of the army. There was only one sentence inside Thank you for everything you will forget now. That was the moment when I realized that the experiment had now succeeded, as well as that it would never be available to ordinary people.
It was a moment of complete agony in my mind, realizing that everything I had ever learned and every idea I had ever had was directed towards this study, now it no longer belongs to me and no improvement will come. I also knew that every further step I took would end the same way.
I didn't make a boy's dream come true, I didn't bring change to this world!
