Lessons from an ugly car

The Mitsubishi Mirage

When the Mitsubishi Mirage came to Canada I bought one the very first year that it came out. It looked very much like the one you see above...but mine was a lime green colour. Why lime green? Well, my son chose the colour. Plus they only had it in green or purple. Personally I liked the green colour, however, when it was time for me to give the car to my son? He decided he hated the colour.

Was it a good car?

I always had to think hard if someone asked me if I would recommend buying the car. Normally it would be an easy YES or NO answer but with this car? It got a whole lot harder to answer. You see...my kids were quick to point out everything that was wrong with the vehicle.

It was small
It has very little power
It was slow
It felt like was going to roll over if you went into a turn fast
It felt drifty on the highway if going fast
It felt like it wasn't able to make it up hills with a lot of people in the car
It had poor noise insulation and you heard lots of road noise
The seats and interior screamed CHEAP!
With a lime green colour everyone knew you were coming. You really stuck out.

My son felt embarassed to take dates in the vehicle

Neither son wanted to be seen going to school in the vehicle.

Both of my sons pestered me renlentlessly about why I would buy such a BAD vehicle.

But I knew something they didn't.

My father gave me advice when I was younger. He told me "Son, once you realize that a car is a tool to get you from here to there and not an extension or your personality".... and he went on to say "Once you learn that it will say you an awful lot of money".

I bought the car with that in mind. The car served the family well for a decade and when we were done with it my nephew got the car and it is still working well for him. It took us on long roadtrips that were thousands of kilometers long. It went on snowy winter hills, it went through death valley in the summer, it went through rainstorms, special occasions and lots of memories.

When we took it down to Los Angeles it was really quite funny. It was the smallest and greenest car you could see. Not another of its type seen the entire time we were driving through the state. It was dwarfed by every other vehicle on the I-90 Freeway.

But....

It kept up with everyone else and got us exactly where we needed to go.

And I knew what really mattered

It was reliable the entire time we had it
The few times it broke it was inexpensive to repair.
It was really cheap on gas so we had much more money to spend when we got to our destination
It held everything we needed
It was easy to park, easy to handle..and easy to find in a parking lot.

In short a car I bought for $15,000 got us everywhere and let us do everything that a $80,000 vehicle would let us do.

But

It only served us well because we maintained it and took pride in it (mostly). Regular maintenance was a must. Oil changes, filter changes, transmission flushes etc. Then a new stereo system for better sound. Sound deadening for a smoother ride. Heavier tint so the AC didn't have to work as hard....and so my son's wouldn't be seen in the vehicle (haha). Plus a block heater so it could function in the cold Canadian winter freezes

One ride you don't get to choose.

Now one of the most important things about being able to enjoy owning a car like a Mitsubishi Mirage is not caring what other people think. After all it is my car, taking me to my destination for my purposes.

If I cared what other people think? I don't think I could drive the Mirage. It's too small. It's too weak. It is too green. It is too ugly. Blah, blah, blah....

And I don't care

I'm living my own life, not theirs. I'm spending my own money and saving for my own future. Why do I worry about what they think.

Granted.... if I was trying to win the heart of a woman I might double think buying a Mirage but... once married who am I trying to impress? People I'll likely never see again? That seems silly. Friends? I mean if a friend judges me based on my ride they aren't much of a friend!

.... and guess what?

Your body is the vehicle that takes you through life.

However unlike a vehicle you don't choose to pick what make and model you get. One of my son's got a heavy duty build. Great for getting physical work done. My other son got a lighter duty build more nimble and sporty. Neither of them had a choice in the matter. No-one does. Some people are gifted with something awesome. Other people seem to lose hard in the genetic lottery. One example that is easy to pull out is Ashton Kucher and his twin brother Michael. One is very handsome, outgoing, movie star, wealthy, beautiful wife and about as close to perfect as it gets. The other? Cerebral Palsy and a heart transplant at the age of 13.

As I said. You don't get to choose the ride your stuck with for life. Genetic lottery certainly isn't fair... at all.

But here is the thing.

While you have no choice in the body you are given you absolutely DO have a choice in how you use it. You have a choice on how you view what you are given and what path you want to take with it.

Powder Room Politics

So many people fall into the "Comparison Trap". If you look at other people and start thinking how much you wish you had.....

Powder Room Politics: A beautiful woman looks at another and wishes they had the other persons sparkly eyes, or long legs, or curvy shape, or blonde hair, or the list is endless. But the original point? The person was beautiful to begin with and it was only after they started comparing that they felt like less than they should be. Comparison is a thief of joy! Please don't fall for it.

Of course body shaming is the other side of the coin. If you happen to be a beautiful person or even if you are a judgmental person you are looking down on another. You are trying to make yourself feel superior at someone else's expense. Oh, look at how fat they are and how fit I am. Or how my complexion is so much better than theirs. It is again using a comparison trap to make yourself feel good at another's expense. How unfair is that?

How do I think about that?

Stay in your own lane
Mind your own business
Or don't judge until you've walked a mile in their shoes.

Pick your cliche but at the end of the day? Do you know why the person is the way they are? Are you so superior that you have the right to judge? I seriously doubt it!

The truth of body positivity

Since you only have one body and you don't get to choose it, might as well own it. It is yours. It is beautifully crafted. It may not be the one you want but why not enjoy it for whatever good points it has. You have a lifetime to figure out what those good points are. Truth be told... its not about the vehicle (body) you are in, its about the journey you take with it.... so make it the best journey!

....and from experience, journey's are much smoother if you aren't arguing about doing it in a Mitsubishi Mirage 😃

The poison of Body Positivity

However, I really dislike the modern version of body positivity. Now Southpark made fun of doing "Lizzo" referencing an influencer named "Lizzo" who is about body positivity and embracing "Fat is beautiful". Now many of her statements I would absolutely agree with. The shape of HER body is none of ANYBODY else's business. Embracing all the dimples, curves and blemishes is important as they are who you are, why get upset about them?

But

While embracing yourself as awesome is great. It is important to understand that taking care of yourself is really important.

Why?

If I said "My Mirage is awesome as it is" and never looked after it? No oil changes? No checkukps? Pushing it beyond what it was capable of? It would die far sooner than it should. It would never have been able to make the long trips. It wouldn't be reliable and would have crapped out on me when I need it most. Guess what. Human bodies are like that!

A human body needs to be taken care of. Exercise. Diet. Rest. Fluids. Mental health time and working within its limits are hugely important! If you put on too much weight? Diabetes? Heart Disease? Joints that wear out and much more. Hmm... Sending a message that "Fat is fine" is the wrong message! The Bible says "Your body is a temple" implying that it should be treated with respect and care. Forget that at your own peril!

Hunting Weight

Now I bet if you look at the image at the top of this post it doesn't look like an ugly vehicle. Maybe your type but not ugly. Here's a little secret that used car dealerships know.

If you want to attract buyers make sure the vehicle is looking polished!

Keep the body of the car clean. Make sure the interior is as spotless as it can be. New tires. Touch up paint. A nice coat of wax. Maybe an air freshener. Whatever it takes to attract that buyer!

Guess what? Human bodies are subject to the same rule...as awful as that may sound.

I had a co-worker who was recently divorced and at work she said she was dieting to get down to "Hunting Weight" as she knew that it would be easier to find someone if she was at a desirable weight. Embrace who you are but sometimes that means doing the best with what you have! If you are looking for a "buyer" ie: mate. It will be easier if you package things well.

Do you have to be perfect? Nope. Should you be yourself? Absolutely. Should you pander or settle? Nope. Should you know your own value? Absolutely.

But here is the thing. Both Men and Women find attractive people, well, more attractive! Sure some men may find fat women attractive and some women may find fat men attractive. I'm sure even a Mitsubishi Mirage could find a buyer if it wasn't made to look nice. However, I'll also wager that more people find fit and healthy people attractive.

Guess what?

Fit and healthy is a goal I think everyone should strive for. Maybe your fit and healthy is a size 2 or perhaps its a size 12. Doesn't matter...that's just what is YOUR size. However, if your body is fit at size 12 and you settle at something considerably larger? Well, I'm going with that being far less than idea.

So... for all those people out there saying that people should be happy with however they are currently? I'm calling bullshit on that.

Unhappy people work to get things done

Your happiness is exactly that. Your own. However, if you are unhealthy and unhappy? Use that! They say necessity is the mother of invention. I'm going to say unhappiness is a great engine for change. Look for steps to make you the best YOU that you can be. Don't listen to other people's criticism but rather see what you can do with the canvas you have been given and work to make you the best you can be. Do that and its easy to deflect any comparisons or put downs that come your way. If you know you gave your best effort with what you are born with? I would take that as a personal badge of accomplishment.

Personally? I'm not handsome. I'm not skinny. I'm not athletic. Honestly I can look at others and never measure up. However, am I doing the best I can with the situation and body I'm given? I like to think so and that lets me deflect criticism very nicely.

The fact that I was handsome enough to find a great wife, well, that just goes to show I may not have been given the body I would want, but I got what I need and I'll be happy with that.

Of course I'm sure some people won't agree with me and I'd love to hear the comments. I love comments. But comments or no comments, Thanks for reading this far. I appreciate it.

Parting thought

Never compare any woman to a car. It will never end well 😁🤣