Pouring Out Thoughts At Midnight.

It's midnight and this is the 1st day in the month of October ,which is actually the independence day for our dear country Nigeria , well that's not what I want to talk about , but somehow , it just feels better to start this post by wishing all Nigerian a Happy independence day. There has been a lot on my mind of late, so it's no news I'm a single mom of two , yeah... I can't hide my kids because I need anyone to like me , or anyone to be friends with me, but somehow it seems to be the pattern that people have been telling to take in a way. You want to be my friend I tell you I have kids, if you think you can stay then fine , we all good. Well it's just been alot of late for me and for them because I had to take care of most of their needs, I always put them first over anything and this is something that I would not change.  So alot has been on my mind, on what path to take in life, you see my results came out, and I'm torn between either waiting for a year before I can further my education or just pick a form by February knowing fully well , I might not be able to pay for my fee and still take care of the kids, so it's been on my mind and also other things too though, but you see other things ? They are just those things that just feels like I need but deep down I know I can do without them , but my education and my kids are like the ones bothering me so much , this has made my head spin all day, I was supposed to do a post on inkwell today, I already started drafting the post but I couldn't concerntrate on what I was writing and so I left it. You know how thoughts just make you get unnecessary headache and make you feel like you are somehow playing with your life? I have felt like this all day and I am still feeling the same way till now, the time right is is 12:51am as I am penning down my thoughts. It might not feel like alot to others when they read this, but to me I know how it feels and how it makes me feel. I am somehow hoping a miracle come for me in a way. You know somehow I feel that I wil be writing more in this community , because it best fit my current suitation and feels like a community made specially for me. This is my first post here anyways , I hope it finds you all well, just ignore how I may sound here, cause it's just me pouring out how I do feel, see you in my next post. _{*Image is Mine*}