Hello friends,

As the title implies today's my 43rd birthday. Born August 6, 1978. Give or take this about 15,695 days of living under my belt, or just shy of half a millions hours of behing here (376,680 hours and counting).

August, 6 1978: - Day of the Week: Sunday - How Long Ago? 42 years, 11 months and 29 days - Leap Year: No - Generation Generation X - Chinese Zodiac: Horse - Star Sign: Leo

On the very same day I was born, at 80 years of age, Pope Paul VI [Giovanni Montini] who was the 262nd Roman Catholic Pope... He kieled over dead of a heart attack heralding my birth into this world. (*true fact, look it up).

August 6 also has the dubious historical record of being the day they dropped the bomb on Hiroshima. Also the first sanction electrocution of a prisoner happened in America... so there's that.

Time to look back

I find that birthdays, are a good time to look back at one's life, ask yourself questions of what you feel most accomplished about and, what you would like to do in the next year laying out in out front of you.

The personal accomplishment I feel most happy about is running away with a circus, then consequently starting my own circus company / entertain business. This I ran for about 10 or 11 years. I learned a lot had many great memories during that time, it was what I wanted to dieidcate my life too.. Then needless drama cause me to seek chage and put a lot of pain on my heart, This broke me, for real... snaped me in two and three's.

Last two years I found myself in Vietnam, sorting out my heart and my head. I am not sure I made much progress on that however... To be quite honest I don't know what I want to do with myself now... I was on the path of building a circus but that is not my path any more... I struggle with finding projects that have the fill me with the same zest I had with the circus.

Perhaps it's because the city that I'm in at the moment is underneath lockdown because of Coivd, or that I struggle with finding stable love and a relationship because I feel broken inside ... It's just that I don't feel any strong motivation to achieve something great anymore, that makes me a bit sad... I find myself waking up lately quite bored, then working most the day via laptop as I am doing now. I wonder if this is the onset of a midlife crisis?

Travel is a passion of mine, and I would like to do more of it... but I was gifted a beautiful puppy dog @kooza... This makes traveling more difficult and more expensive.. but damn do I love that little dog... so while I feel blessed to have him, their is hardships. I feel torn as to what to do with him, just leaving Vietnam and travel ownward, or do I stay? But staying lately has been a challenge as well. The VISA laws here are changing and I've been giving an exit stamp where I have to leave the country. Several employment options have also fallen through here... so its like I am being forced to leave. Technically as of today am over my visa as well and will be fined for every day I stay, but I can't really leave because there are no flights... Feeling a bit traped.

But it's all not gloom and doom...

That being said, workwise, I am filled with gratitude for my employment with @dbuzz and @chrisrice and @nathansenn. They have provided friendship and put trust and belief in me that makes me feel valued and appreciated. This has been a stable source of work and joy that has kept me going!

Here in Vietnam I've also made a lot of great friends such as the amazing @trangbaby who is a ray of positive light and husstle like a champ! She inspires me to get out and keep doing adventures. I have gratitude for her friendship, and the other friends I have made here in Vietnam.

Also as mentioned above, @kooza is a crazy little puppy dog I love and has brought a lot of happiness to me.

What will the next 365 days hold?

I hope, looking foward at this year we see a big run in the crypt of market. Having additional disposable income would open up more possibilities for bringing @kooza with me, and sorting out some life things, and building projects.

This year I hope to keep strengthening my friendship with those people around me, providing better quality work and service to those people and projects I collaborate with and generally try to improve the world around.

I would like to go back to the states and visit my parents and my family who haven't seen now in two years, and my grand ma who is going on 96. WOW!

Perhaps also travel to another place in the world and experience life there, thinking in a more temperate climate that is not in the tropics. Or perhaps travel home then back to Vietnam and continue exploration of this beautiful country when VISA options become more fluid.

Whatever the case whatever the reason, I am filled with happpiness to be alive 100%. I am filled with the appreciation of all the opportunities and days gifted to me, more so for all the friends that I have made and for those friends that have lost ... my heart swells.

Thank you for reading my birthday ranting ramble here. Birthdays are strange thing indeed and it's perhaps good that they only come once a year. lol.

Cheers.

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