I like to suffer suffering! During officer training in the German Armed Forces (wich I went through), you are sometimes sent into the snow-covered forest for a few days to learn how to cope with the conditions there. Little to no food, almost no sleep, but high levels of stress, orientation marches, climbing tours, obstacle courses, etc. On the third day without food, with perhaps a total of four hours of sleep and constant high levels of stress, you are certain for the first time: “I'm at the end of my tether. I can't go on. I give up. Just let me die here, please.” But then you are allowed to catch a fish (with your hands!), and a fire you have made yourself at least protects you from the cold. So it's not easy to die; after all, the body is programmed to survive. And that's where the real insight from this course begins. It's not primarily about finding edible plants in the forest, making a fire, or finding your way in unfamiliar terrain. It's actually about realizing that you can always go much further than you ever thought possible. Who has ever received a letter, email, or phone call with really bad news? Something truly dramatic in an existential sense? Who has ever faced divorce, unemployment, or illness? Situations in which you would like to press the “pause” button, in which it seems almost unbearable to even think about the problem and its consequences. But then there is no pause button, no one who comes and says, “Give it to me, I'll solve it for you.” The situation remains the same; simply holding your breath doesn't help. The hardest realization follows: You have to go through this now. This is where we come full circle. In the aforementioned officer training, I learned that when your strength is fading, when the situation seems hopeless, when you are sure you can't hold out for another minute, you are still far from reaching your full potential. It goes on for days. Push the limits of your own performance, persevere, don't give up, focus on the goal. When I lose sight of this lesson a little, but could really use it, I go running and push myself a little harder than usual. An extra kilometer, a little faster than usual, no walking breaks, running despite the crappy weather. What happens then? I remember that even with sore feet and out of breath or with wet clothes, you still make it back home. That after 5 km, at most you feel “fed up,” but not “I can't do this anymore.” That when you “can't be bothered anymore,” you can still go at least another kilometer—now more than ever. That when you reach the finish line, you forget everything and feel like Superwoman because you've pushed yourself to the limit once again. Then you remember this ability in other situations too. And that's why I sometimes seek out suffering. Just a little bit, to “train” my limits again. Real toughness is when you choose yourself as your opponent.
Kilometers run: 5.4 Friends on the way: 2 other runners with that knowing smile on their faces ;-) Favorite music: „Unstoppable“(Sia)
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